Count Your Blessings

Count Your Blessings

I was raised in a hymn-singing church. My earliest childhood memories are the words and melodies of the anthems sung on Sunday mornings and evenings. One old hymn that sticks to my heart like a Velcro fastener is titled Count Your Blessings.

This hymn talks about the many trials that we as Christians face in this life, it also challenges us, in the midst of trials, to stop and count our blessings. In my mind’s eye, I see a yellow legal pad before me and a pencil in my hand. Starting at the top of the page, I begin to write down the blessings that the Lord has poured out upon me. I am led in this exercise by the chorus of the song:

Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your blessings, see what God has done!
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord has done.

Let me share with you the story of a man who, in the midst of suffering and trials, found the ability to write a wonderful song of thanksgiving and praise—thanksgiving and praise for God’s blessing on his life.

One of the most destructive conflicts in European history was the Thirty Years’ War, fought between 1618 and 1648. By 1637 all of the pastors of Eilenberg, Germany, had either abandoned the city or died of disease, leaving a Lutheran deacon named Martin Rinkart to care for the spiritual needs of the city. In the ensuing years, he performed 4,480 funerals, including the funeral of his own wife. In 1637 alone, 5,000 people died of starvation and disease in Eilenberg, at which time Rinkart was officiating over 40–50 funerals a day.

Rinkart was a prolific writer of poems and hymns. In the midst of this great privation and suffering, he wrote a hymn that reveals the faith of this man of God and his ability to count his blessings, whether on the mountaintop or in the deepest valleys.

Now Thank We All Our God

Now thank we all our God with hearts and hands and voices,
Who wondrous things hath done, in whom His world rejoices,
Who from our mother’s arms hath blessed us on our way
With countless gifts of love, and still is ours today.

O may this bounteous God through all our life be near us,
With ever joyful hearts and blessed peace to cheer us,
And keep us in His grace, and guide us when perplexed,
And free us from all ills in this world and the next.

and thanks to God, the Father now be given,
The Son and Holy Ghost, with Him in highest heaven;
The one eternal God, whom earth and heaven adore;
For thus it was, is now, and shall be evermore.

I don’t know what kind of trials you are facing today, but in the words of Contemporary Christian Music artist Evie Tornquist:

“Give them all, give them all, give them all to Jesus
Shattered dreams, wounded hearts, and broken toys.
Give them all, give them all, give them all to Jesus
And He will turn your sorrows into joy.”

In keeping with this theme, I close with a verse from Count Your Blessings:

“So, amid the conflict, whether great or small,
Do not be discouraged, God is over all;
Count your many blessings, angels will attend,
Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end.”

數算主恩

我是在一間唱聖詩的教會中長大的。童年最早的記憶，就是主日早晚崇拜中所唱的聖詩旋律與歌詞。有一首古老的聖詩，如魔鬼氈般牢牢地貼在我的心裡，歌名是《數算主恩》（Count Your Blessings）。

這首詩歌談到基督徒在今生所面對的種種試煉，同時也提醒我們：即使身處患難之中，也要停下來數算神所賜的恩典。在我的腦海裡，我彷彿看見面前放著一本黃色便條簿，手中拿著一支鉛筆。我從紙張頂端開始，一一寫下主傾倒在我生命中的恩福。而引導我這樣做的，正是副歌中的歌詞：

主的恩典，樣樣都要數，                                                                                                            主的作為都要記清楚，                                                                                                                主的恩典，樣樣都要數，                                                                                                            必能叫你驚訝主奇妙看顧。

讓我與你分享一位弟兄的故事。他在痛苦與試煉之中，仍能寫下一首充滿感恩與讚美的詩歌——為著神在他生命中的恩典獻上感謝與讚美。

歐洲歷史上最具破壞性的戰爭之一，是1618年至1648年的「三十年戰爭」。到了1637年，德國艾倫堡（Eilenberg）所有的牧師不是離開了城市，就是死於疾病，只剩下一位路德宗執事——馬丁．林卡特（Martin Rinkart）繼續照顧全城居民的屬靈需要。在接下來的幾年裡，他主持了4,480場喪禮，其中也包括他自己妻子的葬禮。單單1637年一年，艾倫堡就有5,000人死於飢荒和疾病，而那段期間，林卡特每天要主持40到50場葬禮。

林卡特是一位多產的詩人與聖詩作者。在如此巨大的困苦與患難中，他仍寫下一首詩歌。展現了這位上帝僕人的信仰，以及他無論是身處高山還是低谷，都能數算主恩的能力。

《齊來謝主》

今齊來感謝神，以心、以手、以歌聲，
祂行奇妙大事，普世歡頌主聖名，
從我母懷開始，祂賜福佑至今，
享受無窮慈愛，蒙主眷顧護蔭。

但願恩慈上主，伴我走人生路程，
常賜快樂平安，鼓勵安慰我心靈，
導我脫離疑惑，救我避免病災，
無論今生來世，永享主恩慈愛。

我將頌揚感謝，敬獻父、子與聖靈，
三位本同一體，在天執掌大權柄，
獨一永生上主，天地一同敬拜，
昔在今在永在，直到千秋萬代。

我不知道你今天正面對怎樣的試煉，但借用當代基督教音樂歌手伊薇．托恩奎斯特（Evie Tornquist）的歌詞：

「把一切都交給耶穌，交給耶穌，交給耶穌；
破碎的夢想、受傷的心靈、破舊的玩具。
把一切都交給耶穌，交給耶穌，交給耶穌；
祂必將你的憂傷化為喜樂。」

帶著這樣的信息，我以《數算主恩》中的一節歌詞作結：

「每逢遭遇靈戰不論小或大，主手統治一切你不要懼怕，
深知主有恩典必甘願扶助，安慰引導我們直到見天父。」

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1. Count Your Blessings, Johnson Oatman Jr., 1879

2. Now Thank We All Our God, Martin Rinkart

3. Give Them All to Jesus, Evie Tornquist, 1980

It All Keeps Coming Back to Love and Forgiveness

It All Keeps Coming Back to Love and Forgiveness

For those of you who have read my book The One Another Project, or have listened to the sermons taken from the book over the last several months at SFCAC, you will most likely remember that of the 29 One Another admonitions found in the New Testament, Love and Forgiveness lead the way. Loving one another in the same manner that Christ has loved us. Forgiving one another as completely as we have been forgiven by Christ.

I am continually amazed at how often these two admonitions pop up, not only in the scriptures but also in devotional writings and various prayers of the saints of old.

Many years ago, I was introduced to Celtic worship through writings of the Northumbria Christian Community in Northumberland, UK. When I stepped down from being the Senior Pastor at Sierra Bible Church in Truckee, the vast majority of my hundreds of books went into storage boxes. Among those books were my Northumbria books on prayer and worship. I had almost forgotten about them until this morning, when Pastor Jonathan presented a Celtic devotional reading during the midweek SFCAC Staff Meeting. And there they were again, love and forgiveness, the heart and soul of today’s meditation.

When I look at the blood all I see is love, love, love.
When I stop at the Cross I see the love of God.

What I can’t see is competition. I can’t see hierarchy.
I can’t see pride or prejudice or the abuse of authority.
I can’t see lust for power. I can’t see manipulation.
I can’t see rage or anger or selfish ambition.

I can’t see unforgiveness. I can’t see hate or envy.
I can’t see stupid fighting or bitterness, or jealousy.
I can’t see empire building. I can’t see self-importance.
I can’t see back-stabbing or vanity or arrogance.

I see surrender, sacrifice, salvation, humility,
righteousness, faithfulness, grace, forgiveness, and love!

When I stop at the Cross, I see the love of God. Written by Godfrey Birtill

I just consulted the list of books that fill sixteen boxes in my attic. My books on Celtic worship and prayer are in box number six. I’m heading to my attic! I need a fresh dose of the spiritual refreshment that is found in them. Thanks Pastor Jonathan for this morning’s devotional, I needed its reminder.

一切終究回到愛與饒恕

如果你曾讀過我的著作《The One Another Project》，或是在過去幾個月於三宣家聆聽過根據此書的内容所傳講的講道，你大概會記得：新約中二十九個「彼此」的勸勉當中， 「愛」與「饒恕」是最核心的。我們要彼此相愛，正如基督愛我們一樣；也要彼此饒恕，如同基督完全饒恕了我們。

我常常感到驚訝，因為這兩項勸勉不僅頻繁地出現在聖經中，也不斷出現在靈修著作與歷代聖徒的禱文裡。

多年前，我透過英國諾森伯蘭郡「諾森比亞基督徒社區」（Northumbria Christian Community）的著作，初次接觸到凱爾特（Celtic）敬拜。當卸下Truckee 的 Sierra Bible Church 主任牧師職務後，我將數以百計的藏書裝箱存放。其中也包括那些有關禱告與崇拜的諾森比亞著作。我幾乎已將之遺忘，直到今早，當Jonathan牧師在三宣家的周間同工會上，分享了一篇凱爾特靈修讀物時，這一切又重現眼前——愛與饒恕，正是今日默想的核心與靈魂。

當我凝視那寶血時，我所看見的只有愛、愛、愛。
當我停留在十字架前，我看見的是神的愛。

我看不見競爭；我看不見階級高低。
我看不見驕傲、偏見，或權柄的濫用。
我看不見對權力的貪戀；我看不見操控。
我看不見暴怒、憤恨或自私的野心。

我看不見不饒恕；我看不見仇恨或嫉妒。
我看不見愚昧的爭鬥、苦毒或猜忌。
我看不見建立個人王國；我看不見自高自大。
我看不見背後中傷、虛榮或傲慢。

我所看見的是降服、犧牲、救恩、謙卑、
公義、信實、恩典、饒恕，以及愛！

當我停留在十字架前，我所看見的是神的愛。
—— Godfrey Birtill

我剛剛查看了一下那份放在閣樓、裝滿十六箱書籍的清單。原來那些關於凱爾特敬拜與禱告的書，就在第六號箱子裡。現在我要上閣樓去了！我需要再次從那些書中汲取屬靈更新的力量。感謝 Jonathan 牧師今天早上的靈修分享，我真的很需要這樣的提醒。

Useful to the Master

Useful to the Master

“Nevertheless, the firm foundation of God stands, having this seal, ‘The Lord knows those who are His,’ and ‘Let everyone who names the name of the Lord abstain from wickedness.’  Now in a large house there are not only gold and silver vessels, but also vessels of wood and of earthenware, and some to honor and some to dishonor.  Therefore, if a man cleanses himself from these things, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified, useful to the Master, prepared for every good work” (II Timothy 2:19-21)

When I was a child, I will never forget the first time that I was invited into a job that my father was doing and allowed to help. The thrill was overwhelming. I was contributing, I was of use to my Father for that job on that day. I remember how my heart swelled as I announced to my Mother, “I helped!” There have been times that I have walked into the kitchen at my house and standing on chairs up against the counter were flour-covered grandchildren announcing with glee in their faces and voices, “We’re helping Grandma make cookies!”

As wonderful and marvelous as it is for a child to be invited into the projects of an adult, I have found something even more astounding, that the Creator of the cosmos has invited you and me into His labors, seeing us as, “Useful to the Master!”

God created you with purpose and intent. He created you to play an intricate part in what the German theologians call “Heilsgeschichte” His salvation story. Think about it, there is a part that has been written into the script of history that you and you alone can fulfill. No one else can play the part that was written for you. God created you and has gifted you to be “useful” to Him and His redemptive plan. There is one thing that is necessary, to be used of God, you must be useable.

The fact of the matter is, there are many Christians who are not useable. They have defined the perimeters in which God can use them or the people they will do it with, “Oh, I’m willing to do this, but don’t ask me to do that.” All too many Christians never realize the part in God’s script that was written for them because they call the shots in their life, not Him. “Dear Lord, I would love to be used by You, here are the days and hours that I am available, and please, don’t ask me to work with her. If you can work Your call into my schedule and my conditions, I’m Yours.”

Many think, “If I were just in another location, there I could be used of God.” Want to know a little secret? God cannot use you where you are not. But He can use you where you are, and He wants to begin using you today. You are a valuable asset to God and to the work of His kingdom. God has not saved you to be an ornament in His church, He has saved you that you might be “useful to the Master.” To be useful to the Master will mean that He has permission to interrupt your agenda with His at any time. He will upset your apple cart of your carefully ordered life, but in the process, He’ll fill your life with joy and sense of purpose and you will find yourself squealing like my flour-covered grandchildren, “God let me help!”

合乎主用

然而，神堅固的根基立住了，上面有這印記說：「主認識誰是他的人」，又說：「凡稱呼主名的人總要離開不義。」在大戶人家，不但有金器銀器，也有木器瓦器，有作為貴重的，有作為卑賤的。人若自潔，脫離卑賤的事，就必做貴重的器皿，成為聖潔，合乎主用，預備行各樣的善事。(提摩太後書 2:19-21)

當我還是個孩子的時候，我永遠不會忘記父親第一次邀請我參與他的工作，並允許我幫忙的情景。那種興奮之情難以言喻。我對父親在那一天的那項工作有所貢獻，我對父親是有幫助的。我記得當我告訴母親：「我有幫忙！」時，內心充滿了自豪。也曾有些時候，當我走進家裡的廚房，看見孫子孫女們站在料理台前的椅子上、滿身麵粉，臉上和聲音中都透著喜悅地說：「我們在幫外婆做曲奇餅呢！」

正如小孩子被邀請參與大人的工作是一件何等美好又奇妙的事，我卻發現一件更令人驚嘆的事：宇宙的創造主竟然邀請你和我一同參與祂的工作，並看我們為「合乎主用」的人！

神帶著目的與心意創造了你。祂創造你，是要你在祂的救贖歷史（德國神學家稱之為「Heilsgeschichte」）中扮演一個細緻而重要的角色。試想，在歷史的劇本中，有一段情節是唯獨你才能完成。沒有人能夠取代這個為你而寫的角色。神創造了並賦予你恩賜，使你對祂以及祂的救贖計畫「有用」。但有一件事是必要的：若要被神使用，你必須先成為一個合用的人。

事實上，有許多基督徒其實是「不合乎主用」的。他們為神能如何使用他們、或與哪些人一起服事，設下了界線：「噢，我願意做這件事，但不要叫我做那件事。」太多基督徒從未真正活出神在劇本中為他們編寫的角色，因為掌控人生的是他們自己，而不是神。「親愛的主，我很樂意被祢使用，這是我方便的時間和日期；還有，請不要讓我和她一起服事。如果祢能將祢的呼召安插在我的時間表和條件之內，我就聽候差遣。」

很多人會想：「如果我在另一個地方，我就可以在那裡被神使用了。」想知道一個小秘密嗎？神無法在你不在的地方使用你，但祂能在此時此地使用你，而且祂想從今天就開始使用你。對神和祂國度的工作而言，你是一份寶貴的資產。神拯救你，不是要你成為教會裡的裝飾品，而是要你成為「合乎主用」的人。而「合乎主用」意味著祂隨時有權介入並調整你的計劃。祂會打亂你井然有序的生活，但在這過程中，祂會讓你的生命充滿喜樂與使命感。那時，你也會像我那些滿身麵粉的孫兒們一樣歡呼：「神讓我幫忙了！」

Forgiveness Is Freedom

Forgiveness Is Freedom

Time and time again, we are exhorted by Scripture to forgive one another. The Bible sets a very clear standard for the kind of forgiveness Christians are to offer:

“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.”
(Ephesians 4:32)

I am called to forgive as completely as I have been forgiven. This kind of forgiveness truly sets a captive free—and what’s so amazing is that, more often than not, the captive is me.

There are many forms of sin that can bind and imprison us. Over my forty-nine years of pastoral ministry, I have witnessed the power of unforgiveness and the devastation it brings—not only to the one who refuses to forgive, but also to the concentric circles of relationships surrounding them. Unforgiveness even has the power to infect generations.

“Forgive each other, just as God in Christ has forgiven you.”

I have a pen-and-ink drawing in my office of Christ on His knees, washing Peter’s feet. For me, it is a constant reminder of what servant leadership looks like. But on another level, it continually prompts me to ask myself, “Is there anyone in my life before whom I would be unwilling to posture myself in such a way?”

I often ask myself: Am I harboring any ill will or unforgiveness toward another today? Is there anyone in my life at this moment to whom I would not be willing to go—with basin and towel in hand—and wash their feet?

The Apostle Paul exhorts us to never let the sun set on our anger, for doing so gives great opportunity to the devil (Ephesians 4:26–27).

Is forgiveness easy? No, it is not. But Scripture is clear that harboring ill will or being unwilling to forgive on this horizontal plane greatly compromises our fellowship on the vertical plane—our fellowship with the Lord. In fact, Scripture implies that when we harbor unforgiveness, God’s ears are stopped up from hearing our prayers. Personally, that’s too high a price to pay for the fleeting privilege of harboring ill will against another.

We are commanded to forgive one another regardless of our feelings. Over the years, I’ve found that if I will be obedient in this regard—extending forgiveness when it’s the last thing I want to do—the feelings of forgiveness usually follow closely on the heels of my obedience.

Has anyone come to mind as you’ve read these words? Is there someone you need to forgive, just as God in Christ has forgiven you? If so, don’t let it spoil another day. Before the sun sets, set a captive free.

饒恕就是自由

聖經一再勸勉我們要彼此饒恕。對於基督徒應當如何饒恕，聖經給了一個非常明確的標準：

「並要以恩慈相待，存憐憫的心，彼此饒恕，正如神在基督裡饒恕了你們一樣。」（以弗所書 4:32）

我蒙召去完全地饒恕，正如我已經完全被饒恕一樣。這樣的饒恕真正使被囚的人得釋放——而奇妙的是，那個被釋放的人往往就是我自己。

有許多形式的罪會捆綁並囚禁我們。在我四十九年的牧會生涯中，我目睹了不肯饒恕的力量，以及它所帶來的毀壞 —— 這不僅影響那個拒絕饒恕的人，還波及他們周圍一圈又一圈的人際關係。不饒恕甚至有能力影響幾代人。

「彼此饒恕，正如神在基督裡饒恕了你們一樣。」

我的辦公室裡有一幅鋼筆畫，描繪基督跪著為彼得洗腳。對我來說，這時刻提醒著我什麼是「僕人領袖」的樣式。但在另一個層面，它也不斷促使我反思：「在我的人生中，是否有任何一個人，是我不願意以這種姿態跪在他面前的？」

我常常問自己：我今天是否對某人懷恨在心或不願饒恕？此時此刻，在我生命中是否有任何一個人，是我不願意帶著水盆和毛巾走到他面前，為他洗腳的？

使徒保羅勸誡我們，不可含怒到日落，因為這樣做會給魔鬼留地步 (以弗所書 4:26–27)。

饒恕容易嗎？不，一點也不容易。但聖經明確指出，在人與人之間的「橫向層面」上，若我們心懷怨恨或不願饒恕，會極大地損害我們在「縱向層面」上與主的相交。事實上，聖經暗示，當我們心懷不饒恕時，神會掩耳不聽我們的禱告。對我個人而言，為了享受那種懷恨他人的短暫快感而付出如此代價，實在太過沉重。

我們蒙命令要彼此饒恕，不論自己的感受如何。多年來我發現，只要我在這件事上順服——即使那是我最不想做的事——饒恕的感覺通常會很快隨著順服而來。

在你閱讀這些文字時，腦海中是否浮現了某個人？是否有誰是你需要去饒恕的，正如神在基督裡饒恕了你一樣？如果有的話，不要讓這件事再拖延一天。在日落之前，釋放那個被囚的人吧。

Why We Gather Together

Why We Gather Together

“Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful; and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the day drawing near” (Hebrews 10:23–25).

The words “do not forsake the assembling of yourselves together” reflect the heart of one who understands just how vital gathering with our brothers and sisters in Christ is to Christian growth. Because the passage notes that the habit of some is to forsake these gatherings, we must cultivate a deliberate habit of coming together. Otherwise, we will find ourselves drawn toward the many distractions the world offers to pull us away from the corporate gatherings of the local church.

One of my greatest mentors in understanding what it means to be a pastor was Eugene Peterson. Keenly grasping the message of Hebrews 10:23–25, he wrote:

“In worship the community of God’s people assemble to hear God’s Word spoken in scripture, sermon, and sacrament. The faith that is created by the proclaimed Word develops responses of praise, obedience, and commitment. At no time has there ever been a biblical faith, or any kind of continuing life in relation to God, apart from such common worship. By persisting in frequent, corporate worship in which God’s Word is central, God’s people are prevented from making up a religion of their own private ideas about God. They are also prevented from making a private individualized salvation out of what they experience, by separating themselves from brothers and sisters with whom God has made it clear His saving love is to be shared, both in receiving and giving.”

The author of Proverbs understood this as well. Proverbs 18:1 proclaims, “Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment.” Both the writer of Hebrews and Eugene Peterson echo this truth: isolation fosters self-deception, while community fosters growth and accountability.

There are aspects of Christian life and character that can only be developed as we willingly submit our lives to one another in corporate worship and service—where we intentionally stimulate one another to love and good deeds.

How desperately I need the body of Christ! Its members, both corporately and individually, are the instruments God uses in the ongoing process of conforming me to the image of His Son.

我們為何相聚

「我們也要堅守我們所承認的指望，不致搖動，因為那應許我們的是信實的。又要彼此相顧，激發愛心，勉勵行善。你們不可停止聚會，好像那些停止慣了的人，倒要彼此勸勉；既知道[a]那日子臨近，就更當如此。」（希伯來書 10:23-25）

「不可停止聚會」這句話，反映了一個人深知與主內弟兄姊妹一同相聚，對基督徒的生命成長是何等重要。經文指出，有些人已經養成停止聚會的習慣，因此我們更需要刻意培養常常相聚的習慣。否則，我們很容易被世俗的各種誘惑所吸引，從而遠離地方教會的群體聚會。

在我對牧者職分的認知過程中，尤金．彼得森 (Eugene Peterson) 是對我影響最深的導師之一。他敏銳地領悟了《希伯來書》10:23–25 的信息，並寫道：

“在敬拜中，神的子民群體一同聚集，聆聽神的話語，這話藉著聖經、講道與聖禮被宣講出來。因所宣告的話語而生的信心，會發展出讚美、順服與委身的回應。從來沒有任何一種合乎聖經的信仰，或任何與神持續相交的生命，是可以脫離這種共同敬拜而存在的。當神的子民持續並經常地參與以神話語為中心的群體敬拜時，他們就不致憑著自己對神的個人理解，塑造出一套屬於自己的宗教；同樣地，這也防止了他們將自己的經歷變成一種私有化的救恩；他們不會將自己與弟兄姊妹分隔，因為神已清楚表明，祂那拯救的愛是要在彼此的領受與付出中共同分享。”

箴言的作者同樣明白這個道理。《箴言》 18:1 說：「與眾寡合的，獨自尋求心願，並惱恨一切真智慧。」希伯來書的作者與彼得森都呼應了這個真理：離群索居會讓人產生自欺，而群體則能促進成長並建立督責關係。

有些基督徒的生命特質與品格，唯有我們甘心在群體的敬拜與服事中，彼此委身和順服時，才能被塑造出來——在那裡，我們會有意識地彼此激發愛心、勉勵行善。

我何等需要基督的身體！無論是作為整體，還是其中的個體，教會的肢體都是神所使用的器皿，在持續不斷的塑造過程中，使我愈發彰顯祂兒子的形像。

When Doubts Arise

When Doubts Arise

One of the most important figures in the New Testament was John the Baptist, a prophet from the wilderness of Judea. He came to announce to Israel that the Messiah was coming and called the people to prepare for His arrival. Many came to John as he preached in the wilderness. Many responded to his call to repent and were baptized by him in the Jordan River.

Then, one day, Jesus stepped out from the crowd. When John saw Him, he proclaimed before all, “Behold, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world!” (John 1:29). Jesus then approached John and asked to be baptized. John replied, “I need to be baptized by You, and are You coming to me?” (Matthew 3:14).

But Jesus answered, “Permit it now, for this is fitting for us to fulfill all righteousness.” Then John consented. After Jesus was baptized, He came up from the water, and the heavens were opened. John saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and lighting on Him, and he heard a voice from heaven saying, “This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased” (Matthew 3:15-17).

A short time later, John publicly condemned King Herod for taking his brother Philip’s wife as his own. Because of his rebuke, Herod had him thrown into prison. After a season of suffering in Herod’s dungeon, John sent his disciples to Jesus with one question: “Are You the One who is to come, or shall we look for another?” (Matthew 11:3).

Consider the source of that question. It came from the very man who had identified Jesus as the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world. It came from the same man who saw the Holy Spirit descend from heaven and rest upon Jesus while a voice from heaven declared, “This is My beloved Son in whom I am well pleased.”

And yet even John, after months in a dark and stinking prison cell, began to doubt what he had seen, heard, and proclaimed. Of John, Jesus said, “Truly, I say to you, among those born of women there has arisen no one greater than John the Baptist” (Matthew 11:11). Yet even this great man experienced what many call a “dark night of the soul.”

There have been times in my own life when, in the middle of trials and tribulations, I have wondered, “Is the story really true? Is God really God? Is Jesus who He claimed to be? If He has promised never to leave me nor forsake me, why am I being tried in this way?” I am no different from John.

What is also remarkable about this story is how Jesus answered John’s disciples. He did not simply send them back saying, “Yes, I am the One who is to come.” Instead, He replied, “Go and tell John what you hear and see: the blind receive their sight, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the poor have good news preached to them” (Matthew 11:4-5).

Jesus’ answer pointed John back to Old Testament prophecy, especially the words of Isaiah concerning the ministry of the coming Messiah. John was familiar with these promises.

What I have discovered in my fifty-four years of walking with Christ is that knowing Him does not exempt me from times of testing, trial, and tribulation. The Scriptures do promise that He will never leave me or forsake me (Hebrews 13:5), and I believe that with all my heart. But I have also learned that there are times when He removes the conscious awareness of His presence, and in that space He calls me to trust. Though I may feel as if He is far away and I have been forsaken, the truth is that He is as near as He has ever been.

From the cross, Jesus cried out, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?” When the sinless Son of God took upon Himself your sin, my sin, and the sin of the world, His holy Father turned away from His Son for a moment. Jesus became, as John prophesied, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world.

Here is the truth: Jesus was forsaken by His Father so that those who believe in Him will never be forsaken.

Among the heroes of the faith whose stories fill the pages of Scripture, we see that all of them faced their own personal “dark night of the soul.” Study the lives of Joseph, Moses, David, and Elijah. Consider also the lives of Jesus’ disciples and the Apostle Paul in the New Testament. None were exempt. And yet, in their valleys of testing and affliction, they found His grace to be sufficient. John did as well.

當懷疑萌生時

新約聖經中最重要的人物之一是施洗約翰，他是來自猶大曠野的一位先知。他受命向以色列宣布彌賽亞即將到來，並呼召百姓為祂的降臨做好準備。當約翰在曠野傳道時，許多人慕名而來；許多人響應他的呼召，悔改並由他在約旦河裡受洗。

直到有一天，耶穌從人群中走出來。約翰看見祂，便在眾人面前宣告：「看哪，神的羔羊，除去世人罪孽的！」（約翰福音 1:29）。耶穌隨後走向約翰，請求受洗。約翰回答說：「我當受你的洗，你反倒上我這裡來嗎？」（馬太福音 3:14）。

但耶穌回答說：「你暫且許我，因為我們理當這樣盡諸般的義。」於是約翰許了祂。耶穌受了洗，隨即從水裡上來，天就為祂開了。約翰看見神的靈彷彿鴿子降下，落在祂身上；並聽見從天上有聲音說：「這是我的愛子，我所喜悅的。」（馬太福音 3:15-17）。

不久之後，約翰因公開譴責希律王強佔其兄弟腓力的妻子而入獄。在希律的監牢中受盡折磨後，約翰差遣他的門徒去問耶穌一個問題：「那將要來的是你嗎？還是我們等候別人呢？」（馬太福音 11:3）。

請思考這個問題的來源。它出自那個曾指認耶穌是「除去世人罪孽的神的羔羊」的人。它出自那個曾目睹聖靈從天降下落在耶穌身上，並親耳聽到天父宣告「這是我的愛子，我所喜悅的」那個人。

然而，即便是約翰，在陰暗、惡臭的牢房裡度過了數月之後，也開始對自己所見、所聞、所宣告的一切產生了懷疑。耶穌論到約翰時曾說：「我實在告訴你們，凡婦人所生的，沒有一個興起來大過施洗約翰的。」（馬太福音 11:11）。然而，即使是這樣一位偉人，也經歷了許多人所說的「靈魂的暗夜」。

在我自己的生命中，也曾有過這樣的時刻。在試煉與苦難中，我曾懷疑：「這個故事是真的嗎？神真的是神嗎？耶穌真的是祂自稱的那一位嗎？如果祂應許永不離開我，也不撇棄我，為什麼我會遭受這樣的試煉？」在這些時刻，我發現自己跟約翰沒什麼兩樣。

這個故事的引人注目的部分還在於耶穌對約翰門徒的回應。祂沒有簡單地讓他們回去說「是的，我就是那一位」，而是說：「你們去，把所聽見、所看見的事告訴約翰：就是瞎子看見，瘸子行走，長大麻瘋的潔淨，聾子聽見，死人復活，窮人有福音傳給他們。」（馬太福音 11:4-5）。

耶穌的回答是在提醒約翰去回想《舊約》中關於彌賽亞的預言。約翰對這些應許是熟悉的。

在跟隨基督的五十四年裡，我發現認識祂並不意味著可以免受考驗、試煉與苦難。聖經確實應許祂永不離開我，也不撇棄我（希伯來書 13:5），我全心全意地相信這一點。但我也學到，有時祂會暫時收起讓我們「感覺得到」的同在，在那段空白裡，祂要求我們單單去「信靠」。儘管我可能覺得祂離我很遠，覺得自己被遺棄了，但事實是，祂一如既往地離我那麼近。

在十字架上，耶穌大聲喊著：「我的神！我的神！為什麼離棄我？」當無罪的耶穌承擔了你我及世人的罪，聖潔的天父曾有一刻轉臉不看祂。正如約翰所預言，耶穌成為了除去世人罪孽的神的羔羊。

真相是：耶穌被祂的父離棄，是為了讓那些信祂的人永遠不被離棄。

在聖經中那些信心英雄的故事裡，我們看到他們每個人都面對過屬於自己的「靈魂暗夜」。看看約瑟、摩西、大衛和以利亞的生平；再看看新約中耶穌的門徒和使徒保羅。沒有人能幸免。然而，在試煉與痛苦的低谷中，他們發現上帝的恩典是夠用的。約翰也是如此。